July 4, 2014
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Pentagon Discovers Cure for PTSD

Under the cloak and dagger of this train, mentor, and advise mission, troops and their contractual brethren will be monitored to determine whether their symptoms of PTSD maintain, increase, or decrease throughout their deployment.

June 18, 2014
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Dr. Berghdal Awarded Teaching Position at DLI

Monterey, California (June 18, 2014) – The Department of the Army released a statement regarding ex-prisoner Bowe Berghdal today, announcing that as soon as he is cleared by the medical staff caring for him during his recovery, he will be on orders to the Defense Language Institute (DLI).

May 19, 2014
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Paratrooper Denied Silver Star Because of Tattoos

(Fort Bragg, NC) May 19th, 2014 – The 82nd Airborne Division is under pressure today, as early reports are leaking that a soldier, Staff Sergeant Adam Johnson, had his Silver Star downgraded to a Certificate of Achievement due to the fact that he has sleeve tattoos.

May 16, 2014
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President Obama Uses Threat of International Criminal Court to Purge General Officer Ranks

(Washington, D.C.) May 1st, 2014 -  The US intelligence community was in an uproar on Wednesday when General Mike Flynn, the leader of the largest and most effective intelligence agency in the world, abruptly announced his retirement. 

May 2, 2014
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Jay Carney Fired Over On-Air Outburst

Washington, D.C. (May 2nd, 2014) – White House Press Secretary Jay Carney finally cracked under the pressure of renewed criticism aimed at the administrations handling of the Benghazi debacle today.

April 30, 2014
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Army Introduces “No Tab Left Behind” Program

(Pentagon, Washington D.C.)  April 29th, 2014 - Perpetually-embattled Sergeant Major of the Army Raymond Chandler is under fire yet again, this time for a controversial change to Army Regulation (AR) 670-1, which governs the wear and appearance of Army uniforms.

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