December 2, 2015

Congress to Get New Balls

Hit The Woodline has learned that Neuticles, a Missouri company that manufactures and sells testicular prosthetic implants for neutered pets, has rolled out a new line […]
December 1, 2015

New Law Unleashes New Freedom Foods

Congress just passed a bill making falafel illegal in the US. It can now only by sold and consumed under more Anglicized names. Bill H.R. 3596 […]
November 30, 2015

Green Berets Date Back to Civil War

U.S. Army Special Operations Command announced today that credible evidence has been found that suggests the earliest Green Berets date back to the Civil War, and […]
November 30, 2015

America Needs A Dynasty

Jeb Bush’s campaign is hustling to do damage control after an exchange Sunday between Bush and John Dickerson on CBS’s “Face the Nation” wherein Bush seemed […]
November 25, 2015

30 Rules for a Happy Thanksgiving

In preparation for tomorrow, we, the editors of Hit The Woodline, offer the following ROEs and/or suggestions, whether on post, a ship, FOB, COP, at home, […]
November 25, 2015

ISIS Reaches Out to NFL Refs

Hit the Woodline has learned that ISIS and al Qaida have contacted the NFL’s Officiating Department in hopes of contracting their help in the growing competition […]
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